It’s after midnight and I wanted to get another quick post in before I get back to my school work. (Yes, I’m just taking a short break.) I have to finish watching the last Live Chat that I missed last week due to the transfer so that I can get working on writing the rest of an IP.
The real reason I’m writing another post this soon from the last one is as the title says: “How I feel?” Well, as I briefly mentioned in the last post about chest pains, it was stress induced so I agreed to talk to a psychiatrist and figured this is way freakin’ cheaper! 
I’m not looking for comments, just venting. The image on the right kind of describes how I feel, but I’ll let you figure out if I’m talking about the window or the frame.
Nathan has been a great friend, letting me vent whenever I need it and he’s around, while it’s a pain in the ass to get a hold of anyone else. Even the people that were on vacation and didn’t do any traveling, they still managed to be too busy when we talked more than once about hanging out. I’m not mad, just a little disappointed.
So, let’s start off by describing what feelings a ‘normal’ person should have and compare that to what I think I may have:
| Financial Security | Disability doesn’t pay shit; College is expensive as hell; not allowed to work, you do the math |
| Loved by others | Not that I know of… |
| In love with someone else | Yes, but I could never tell her |
| Socially Accepted | At a red light, heading home from my treatment, someone heard the music (in Yiddish) in my car and yelled “Terrorist” |
| Pressure to succeed | College is stressful, the little I can do for my company is suffering |
| Love Life | What’s a love life? I don’t remember… |
I might add some more to that later, cause it’s depressing. Well, Robin Williams was just on TV and I actually laughed a bit, so I lost my train of thought.
More
Later